Two Thousand Years
by Lady Sarai
Summary: Sirius has a nightmare and Remus does some late-night thinking. Then Sirius does some thinking of his own. (Slash awaits... beware of mush.)
1. In a Heartbeat

  
  
  
  
**Title:** Two Thousand Years: In a Heartbeat  
**Author:** Sarai (aka Princess Emma)  
**Archive:** FF.Net, hopefully Azkaban's Lair, and anywhere so long as I'm informed  
**Summary:** Sirius has a nightmare and Remus does some thinking. Short and sweet.  
**Spoilers:** PoA, mostly, I think  
**Rating:** G  
**Disclaimer:** No character belongs to me; neither do the lyrics. I'm just amusing myself with them.  
**Originally posted:** FF.Net  
**Notes:** I've been dying to write this forever but could never get it right. And then, the day after Valentine's day... Voila! I'm just happy right now... Happy belated Valentine's Day!  
** Warnings:** Slash; Remus/Sirius. But absolutely nothing but warm, gushiness.  
**Dedications:** Uh... To Zoe and Arnica, who forced me to see how cool this pairing really is. And Aradia 'cause I can't leave her out. Love you guys!  
**Feedback:** LtJupiter@aol.com  
  
  
  
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_Too many kingdoms  
Too many flags on the field  
So many battles, so many wounds to be healed  
Time is relentless  
Only true love perseveres  
It's been a long time and now I'm with you  
After two thousand years  
  
_ ~ Billy Joel; "Two Thousand Years"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  
  
  
Sirius was having a nightmare. I knew it before I'd even fully woken, and rolled over to shake him gently. I watched him wake with a start, his breath catching and eyes opening too widely. They flitted around the room wildly until they found mine and he fought to get his breathing under control. He was cold and clammy and beneath my hand his heart beat frantically. A strand of dark hair fell over one haunted eye and I reached up, gently brushing it behind his ear. I trailed my hand to cup his jawline and brushed my thumb over his cheekbone. He closed his eyes and leaned his face against my hand, sighing.  
  
"Oh, Sirius," I breathed with a sigh of my own. His nightmares were common affairs, though fewer and farther between nowadays. They tended to resurface when it began to turn cold, or when he was especially worried about Harry- which seemed to be a more and more frequent thing these days. In any case, they always left him cold, shaking and depressed. It made my heart ache for him.  
  
I dropped a kiss on his shoulder and pushed myself further up in the bed. Positioning myself against the pillows, I wrapped my arms around him and he sighed again, smiling weakly and rolling over, settling into my embrace. He lay his head on my shoulder and I leaned my cheek against the top of his head. I sighed, feeling him tremble minutely as I trailed my fingers down his back. Tightening my hold on him, I turned my head to kiss the top of his head and breath in the smell of his shampoo.  
  
I felt him smile slightly against my collarbone and he began to idly trace the scars on my chest with his fingertips. We lay like that for a long while, until Sirius' heartrate returned to normal and he stopped shaking. Even after that, we lay there in each other's arms, absent-mindedly tracing invisible patterns on each other with the pads of our fingers. His breath against my bare chest gave me goosebumps, but I wasn't cold.  
  
A lump formed in my throat and I clenched my jaw, biting my tongue to ignore it. I shut my eyes and held Sirius to me, trying not to shake myself. It was just suddenly too much. Too much time, too much pain... We'd been though too much. If someone had told me twenty years before that James and Lily would be dead, Peter a traitor, Sirius a wanted murderer and me completely alone... I wouldn't have believed them. But it was true. All of it. And neither Sirius nor I were- or ever would be- the same. We were different people... But I still loved him. With every fiber of my being I loved him and it killed me to see him hunted and haunted, tortured for something that wasn't his to be punished for. I buried my face in his hair, wondering at the act as I did it. It was beyond my comprehension how it was that I held him in my arms now. He was here and real and alive... and innocent. Deep down, I'd always wondered... It hurt to think of it.  
  
I didn't realize that I was crying until Sirius pulled back and looked at me with concern on his face. He reached up and brushed my cheek. "Remus..." he murmured wonderingly. It had been a long time since I'd broken down like this.  
  
I managed a shaky smile. "I'm all right," I said quietly. "Just..." I trailed off, trying to find a word for it. It was an ache, a pain I'd carried along with me since the night Lily and James died and I didn't know what to do with it. I saw the way Sirius looked at me and all I could think of was how lucky we were, to be alive and together. "Happy," I managed to whisper, knowing it was the wrong word, but not sure what else to say.  
  
Sirius eyed me for a while, then kissed me gently. "That's not what you mean," he whispered, amazing me. He smiled and ran his eyes over my face, the smile fading slowly and a look coming into his eyes I couldn't quite place, except that I knew it must be the same as the one in mine. "I..." he stopped, swallowing. He kissed me again. "I love you, Moony," he said finally, his voice shaking.  
  
I smiled up at him with tears in my eyes. Kissing him back, I managed to whisper, "I love you, Padfoot. More than life itself."  
  
  
  



	2. Waking

  
  
  
  
**Title: ** Two Thousand Years: Waking  
**Author: ** Sarai (aka Princess Emma)  
**Archive:** Anywhere so long as I'm informed, FF.Net, and hopefully Azkaban's Lair  
**Summary:** The morning after "Two Thousand Years: In a Heartbeat", Sirius does some thinking of his own.  
**Spoilers:** PoA, again  
**Rating:** PG, maybe PG-13, depending on how sensitive you are to implications... Probably PG-13 for safety's sake.  
**Disclaimer:** No character belongs to me. I swear to put them back on the shelf when I'm done. And Billy Joel's lyrics are his; I just love them.  
**Originally posted:** FF.Net  
**Notes:** I was happy with my first Remus/Sirius fic, especially since I wrote it in one evening... The next morning I woke up and an hour later, while I was still half-asleep, this was done. I'm amazing myself... And very happy with these.  
**Warnings:** Slash; Remus/Sirius. Some slightly un-subtle innuendoes. Nothing too scary... hopefully. :-)  
**Dedications: ** To my fellow Lady Marauders, Zoe, Aradia and Arnica because I love them. (And it's all their fault- which is only okay because Arnica gave me an evil Sith hood for this.)  
**Feedback:** LtJupiter@aol.com  
  
  
  
  
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_And in the evening  
After the fire and the light  
One thing is certain: nothing can hold back the night  
Time is relentless  
And as the past disappears  
We're on the verge of all things new  
We are two thousand years._  
  
~~ Billy Joel, "Two Thousand Years"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
  
I woke slowly, blinking in the dim sunlight filtering through the shades into the room. I shifted the weight on my hip a bit, smiling. My left arm lay at an odd angle, acting as a pillow for the pillow and I knew my shoulder would give me hell for it later. I didn't care. I simply smiled and buried my face further into Remus' hair, breathing in deeply the smell of citrus shampoo, underlayed by something wonderfully and uniquely Remus. My other arm was flung out, resting over his hip. I would have been happy to lay like that all day, me on my side, Remus on his stomach and both of us a tangle of sheets and limbs, spooned together and just... fitting.  
  
Remus was facing the westward side of the room, so the sunrise behind me wouldn't bother him for some time- he'd always been a heavier sleeper than me anyhow. I didn't mind. Never had. It was always one of my favorite things, waking up with him beside me. It never ceased to amaze me how damn lucky I was to have him, this time around especially. So I breathed in that smell which was innately Remus and watched him sleep, feeling his stomach rise and fall beneath my arm with each breath he took.  
  
'I love you,' I thought at him, kissing his hair. I loved him so much it was like a physical pain- that was one thing the dementors had never been able to take from me. They took everything else, though- his smile, his laugh, his smell. The way it felt to hold him in my arms. I was left with nothing, except the fear- the certainty- that he hated me, blamed me and believed what everyone was saying about me. And guilt. Guilt that I'd ever, *ever* suspected him for the least second. And a cold knowledge that I would never see him again, didn't deserve to. And I still loved him- never stopped- which made it all the worse.  
  
And now... I didn't understand how it was I deserved any of this. We'd been through so much, come so far... and we still fit, like two puzzle pieces locked together. I loved him so much it was an ache deep in my chest and a knot in the pit of my stomach. I was so afraid that what we had would be stolen away from us again...  
  
The nightmares were bad. Feeling of bone-deep cold and soul-deep despair that I couldn't bear to live with. How I'd survived 11 years of it, I'm not sure. Remus always knew when I dreamed. And knew what to do. Harry knew when I dreamed too. All he had to do was fix me with that gaze I remembered all too well- Lily had used it often- and he knew. He would smile sadly, or sigh, and hug me or just take my hand. Offering whatever he could offer. It was always almost enough. But it killed me how much these dreams hurt them, too. They were the most important things in my life, and I hated hurting them.  
  
I forced myself back under control, loosening the vice-like grip I'd had on Remus for a moment. I felt him stir slightly and his breathing pattern caught and shifted. He woke, but took a moment before glancing over his shoulder at me with sleep-bleary eyes. He smiled and rolled over, slipping an arm under my waist and laying his head on my arm under the pillow. I lay the flat of my palm against the small of his back and smiled back at him.  
  
He moved his hands along the sides of my rib cage, tickling without meaning to. His eyes bored into mine. "Are you all right?" he asked, his voice still thick and unused.  
  
I couldn't help but smile. I kissed his forehead and trailed kisses down his nose to his mouth. Increasing the pressure of my hand against his back, I pulled him closer, ready to bust for joy and wonder at having him in my arms again. "Yes," I told him honestly when I let go, pulling away only far enough that our lips brushed as I spoke. "I am absolutely all right."  
  
I felt him smile and wrap his arms more completely around me. "Good," he murmured. "I love you."  
  
I kissed him again, answering without words. I didn't need them. I had him. A second chance... And that was all that mattered.  
  
  
  



End file.
